


Surreality TV

by Old_Soldier



Series: So Dimension Twisted [2]
Category: Forgotten Realms, Kim Possible (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Supernatural, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, Dimension Travel, Dreams and Nightmares, Fantasy, Gen, Horror, Non-Canonical Violence, Platonic Female/Male Relationships, Wordcount: 1.000-5.000, fan fiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-20
Updated: 2013-07-20
Packaged: 2017-12-20 20:34:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,534
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/891559
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Old_Soldier/pseuds/Old_Soldier
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The opening moves are made.  Who will be first to turn in their fish?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Surreality TV

### Prologue: One Nightmare Before Vortex

The Supreme One, also known as Shego and dominatrix of the entire world flourished her green cape as she sashayed casually to her captive.  Despite the modesty of her green and black outfit her shapely athletic form was easily discerned; her pale skin, tinged with a hint of mint green, was unlined and only bore the tiniest of scars earned from previous years of fighting; the emerald green eyes hinted of some exotic heritage; her rich mane of wavy raven tresses hanging down to her hips were graced with a sheen of green that seemed to flow across her hair of its own volition.  Her makeup was a bold application of black eyeliner and mascara and black lip stain.  The only hint to her middle age being the band of white hair contrasting her sable locks.

Stopping in front of her battered teen foe, Kim Possible, Shego leans back on one leg as she casually inspects the claws of one of her gloves, "So, Princess, you really aren't all that are you?" the green-skinned woman sneered at the dying redhead. 

Exhausted and defeated the teen hero could not find it within herself to reply.  The nanites, injected into her skull by the laser pointer above the table she was bound to, were coursing through her body, making her feel as if her insides were on fire and her flesh melting. Her wrist had been crushed and her right elbow and shoulder dislocated when genetically enhanced Drakken shook her like a rag doll outside the window to the throne room.

"So, what is that catch phrase you seem to enjoy uttering with such confidence? I can do anything? Does that include getting your team killed?" mocked the Supreme One as she picked up Rufus' dead body and vaporized the naked mole rat with a plasma enshrouded hand.

While the green dictator was momentarily diverted the young hero glanced around through swollen eyelids. They had been set up, the ambush perfectly executed, and it was her fault! Her best friend, Ron, was still hanging by his shirt on the nose of the bust of Shego; the front of his skull burned away by Shego's plasma hand as she scooped out the contents of his skull and turned them to ash.  Wade and her brothers had been burned, shredded and dismembered by the shower of exploding golf balls that had enveloped them; their bodies lay decapitated on Shego's orders in front of her in the throne room.  Even though they appeared to be in their late twenties Kim could not help but picture them as she remembered them...ten year olds.  She had no idea what happened to the Rufus 3000 Series mole rats but assumed it was not good. 

The sidekicks, Drakken, Monkey Fist and Killigan, wearing obedience collars, stood patiently to the side, gloating, yet prudently and silently awaiting further orders from their sadistic leader.  The Supreme One leaned over her 'entertainment' and with a right cross broke the redhead's jaw.  Emerald eyes taking in the sight before her; the older woman smiled evilly.  Grasping the hero's dislocated shoulder with her left hand she slowly grated the bones together while blistering the skin with her plasma.  Ripping away the front of her foe's shirt Shego paused to admire the teen's breasts, "Not a big rack, Cupcake, but pretty; quality over quantity huh?" At which point she scrawled with a fire lit finger 'Property of Shego' across the breasts.  At this point Kim was too weak to scream and all that came through her broken jaw was an agonized moan.

Shego spoke to the large blue man beside her, "Has there been enough time for the nanites to get into position Dr. D.?"

"Yes oh Supreme One."

Pulling an Ultimate Remote Control from her belt the evil green woman turned to her young victim, "Well Pumpkin, it's been real; time to erase you from history.  Oh, wait this is gloat time, right Dr. D.?" At his enthusiastic nod she continued, "You see Princess, I injected you with these nanites.  When I press this button they will dismantle you, molecule by molecule, starting with the bone structure, soft tissue then vital organs.  The components will be directed to the blood stream where they will unavoidably pass through the urinary tract which means you'll literally be pissing your life away�hey that's pretty good, pissing your�heh.  Anyway Pumpkin, it's slow and excruciating and even though you're kinda small you're still worth nine or ten hours of entertainment.  Oh, I'm not a complete bitch; you can watch too, the nanites will keep you conscious and alive until there isn't enough of your body left to keep it alive."  At which point Shego pushed a button on the URC as she watched teen's head shake weakly.  For Kim, it suddenly felt as if every bone in her body had been replaced by white hot pokers�.

Her ensuing scream reverberated throughout the house, violently waking up as a long column of black, greasy vapour exits her body and heads for the window to her room.  Kim lay in a foetal position on her bed, sobbing uncontrollably. She had that nightmare again. The nightmare about a mission she did not remember ever being on.

Frantically she grabbed her Kimmunicator to contact Wade, the eleven year old Afro-American boy who ran her website and coordinated the Team Possible missions; it only took him a moment to realize what had happened and asked softly, "You had that dream again Kim?"

Her hands trembled and her voice broke, "Please Wade, you know the drill."

"Sure Kim," after tapping some keys he responded, "Your parents are fine on their weekender to Go City, Ron is good at his grandparents and your brothers are okay on their overnighter at their friend's house.  And I still can't find any references to that mission since those dreams started at the beginning of Junior Year.  This is your seventh episode Kim and I think I've come across a statistically significant observation."

"Please Wade, so not in the mood for numbers right now."

"Please Kim this is the first break I've had."

"Ok Wade."

"So far the only thing that correlates for these episodes is that each time you have one Ron, Monique and your Mom are away at the same time.  It's only preliminary, but I have something to work with and I'll dig into it further.  You going to be ok?"

"Yeah thanks Wade you rock."

As she lay back and began to relax Kim was reminded of an unpleasant by-product of the nightmares; she had soiled herself and her bed again�... _this is when I am so glad no one is home right now, it would be so ferociously awkward explaining this to mom�: rubber room anyone_?

After a tedious and unpleasant cleanup, and very welcome hot shower the exhausted hero returned to her room.  Not feeling motivated to put on fresh pyjamas�... _another perk of being home alone_...�Kim unlocked the trunk at the foot of her bed to retrieve the only source of comfort available at the moment, a plush toy that was part panda and part kangaroo, "Hi Pandaroo, how ya been�...yeah, I had another one�...you don't mind do you�...thanks buddy, you're the best."

With that the emotionally battered teen hero snuggled with satisfaction under fresh blankets hugging her favourite Cuddlebuddy. 

Outside Kim's bedroom window a woman wearing a black and green harlequin catsuit, with long black hair sat, content that the teen was composed enough to return to sleep. Her eyes flaring an intense neon green Shego glanced down in revulsion at what she held in her hand. Encased within a ball of plasma squirmed the black vapour that had caused the younger girl's anguish.

"Fa'durtzkak!" mutters the strange incarnation of Shego in disgust. Focusing on her captive Shego wills the essence of the demonic incarnation to annihilation, hearing in her mind the evil entity's wail of despair.  With the demon banished, Shego's eyes return to normal; dazed and confused she returns to her hidden hovercar and flies back to Drakken's lair, never to remember the incident.

### Vortex Day

"Come Shego, I've made some repairs to the compiler; time to leave this travesty," and with that the blue-skinned mad scientist pulled the lever to his device.

Shego commented with uncertainty at the rather weak looking cable tv vortex, "Umm, that doesn't look very�"

"�Stop being panic-nantic," interrupted Dr. Drakken harshly as he dragged his sidekick through the feeble looking cable vortex.  
-.-

Clutching the dimensional compiler tightly, Drakken looked nervously around to find himself back in the 'Jabbermitten' children's show cable TV realty; unable to see his sidekick, Shego, he called out uncertainly for her.  When she did not respond after a several attempts he began panicking; glancing quickly around to make sure Mr. Sitdown was nowhere near he looked into the vapid face of the closest 'mitten', "Nngh�uh�ah,yes�umm, hello; do you see something green?"  
-.-

The raven-haired mercenary was thrust unceremoniously out of the feeble cable vortex to land, sprawled on the ground.  Groaning as she slowly got up, Shego grumbled as she realized she was not back in Drakken's lair, "Ugh, ya know what Dr. D., maybe you shoulda asked those Evil Eye guys for a new compiler thingy instead of learning how to make evil pâté; so where are we this time?"  Expecting to hear Drakken's whiney rant the sidekick is shocked to hear instead a smooth, deep baritone voice, spoken with a slight slurring from above.  Pulling aside her raven tresses from her face the mint-skinned woman looks up at the expectant countenance of a very, very, large gold scaled dragon.

With a slight smile the regal creature responds to the woman's obviously rhetorical question, "You are where you are needed, Redeemer; we need to talk."

Her face expressing resigned exasperation Shego mutters dryly, "Oh, good."  
-.-

After her arch-foes disappeared Kim spoke into her Kimmunicator, "Go Wade!"  With that Team Possible stepped through a much healthier looking cable vortex; on the other side the team leader exclaimed, "I never thought I'd be glad to be back�in�so�not�Drakken's�place�."

"KP did the Evil Eye guys come back and add an arbitrary to Drakken's lair?"

"I think you mean arboretum Ron and judging from the daylight above I don't think we're in Drakken's lair at all."  Pulling the Kimmunicator out Kim tried to contact Wade.

"Look at the size of these trees KP, we must be in that Sequoia tree place which means we're in the states; all we gotta do is call for a ride and we'll be home in no time."

Following Ron's gaze the redhead surmised they were not looking at Sequoia trees.  These trees grew tall and straight enough however the bark was almost black, the trunks devoid of branches until near the top where what appeared to be tiny, lacy branches forming a halo around the top.  With the trees clustered close together the copse of woods had a dark eerie feel to it as well as being distinctly cold.  The former Pixie was conversant with many types of trees however this one was entirely new to her.  Kim responded, "No dice Ron, I've lost contact with Wade and, FYI, those aren't Sequoia trees.  Check the cable guide, maybe we're in another TV show."

"Right KP," opening the guide he continued, "After Ape Island are sitcoms, chick flicks, sports, news�there's nothing about the outdoors at all."   During the discussion Rufus ducked back into Ron's cargo pocket after seeing a centipede three feet long slither past.

"Ok Ron, its cool out and the vegetation doesn't match anything we've seen in the tropics; so it's either North America, Europe or Siberia," pulling out her compass Kim was puzzled when it would not settle on North, "Since it's likely no one knows where we are it looks like we'll have to get ourselves out.  C'mon Ron let's jet."

"Right behind ya, KP."

About half an hour of walking brought Team Possible out of the dell they had appeared in and into the welcome warmth of the midday sun atop a meadow covered rise.  Looking around, Kim noted the area to the east and west, snaking between a large forest to the south and mountain foothills to the north, was more of the same rolling meadows with the odd copse of trees.  To the east she could see a river that appeared to be flowing southward.  The team leader's attention was drawn by her partner.

"KP, I think we must be close to the Himalayas, look at the size of those mountains."

"Wow Ron, those are huge.  But we're at the wrong latitude for them because the sun is too low in the sky.  With the sun at this angle, in spring time we would have to be either in Northern Canada, Siberia or Scandinavia and there isn't any large east - west mountain range like this in those places.  There's a river to the east, let's go there and head downstream, maybe we'll find a settlement." 

Late afternoon found the intrepid duo at a modest river not quite forty yards across.  Thankful that Ron had hung on to his backpack through all the cable vortices Kim retrieved the emergency kit and pulled out the fishing tackle, glad for the fishing excursions with Joss and Uncle Slim during summer visits.  Ron went foraging; coming back with branches for firewood he saw his partner coming back with a stringer of some of the biggest trout he had ever seen, "Wow KP, that's a pretty good haul."

"You said it Ron, I never had this kinda luck in Montana; these were practically getting in each other's way to get the bait," smiling sheepishly she held the fish out to her partner, "Would you mind Ron; cleaning out fish guts makes me hurl."

A sharp whistle from Rufus caught their attention.  Looking in the direction he indicated they saw what appeared to be a little girl walking along the edge of a bluff overlooking the river just upstream.  Seeing her stumble off the bluff galvanized the hero and sidekick into action.  The child landed flat on its back and went under bobbing to the surface a moment later facedown in the water.  Aiming her hair dryer across the river the redhead fired, anchoring the grapple to a tree; retracting the cable accordingly she intercepted the body as it floated by on the current� _DAMN, this water is freakin' COLD!_   Pushing a thumb catch on her hair dryer released the cable, pushing it again reloaded it, a fresh grapple and spool of cable at the ready.  Aiming back to where she came from Kim fired, pressing the high speed retract button so she and the rescued girl could leave the cold water as quickly as possible.  

Upon reaching the riverbank the waterlogged pair was helped ashore by Ron, "More wood on the fire Rufus, they look real cold."

"Unh-huh got it."

Reflexively the redhead pressed the reset on the hairdryer, spooling the cable and retracting the grapple; returning the device to its holster, "Ron, CPR!"

Over the next several minutes Ron did the compressions while Kim ventilated until the dark haired girl coughed up water and resumed breathing.  Laying her shivering patient close to the fire Kim looked more closely at her.  Although her breech cloth appeared to be made of woven grass interweaved with some silvery thread, it was supple and already mostly dry; the honey brown and supple high cut buckskin moccasins were also finely crafted� _these would fetch a ferociously spankin' price at Club Banana�_.  Intricately applied and attractive artwork was painted on her upper body and arms with feathers accenting her long black hair; however, she soon realized the slightly pointed ears were not prosthetics and the hint of green tinge highlighting her brown skin was not makeup.  Olive eyes suddenly grew wide with disbelief and the hero gasped in shock; despite all the strange features and, although looking more six than sixteen she found the face to be more than familiar, "Ron, she looks like Monique!"

"No way KP, she's way too young and even at that age there's no way she'd go around topless."

Curiosity getting the better of him, Rufus scampered over to investigate. After giving the girl a good going over with his nose and eyeing her closely, he stood on her chest  Scratching his head with a puzzled look the mole rat looked up at the duo, shrugged, and pointed at the little girl, "Unh-huh, 'Niq'.

Ron and Kim each looked at the other, "No�way!" 

"Jinx, you owe me a soda," the redhead added automatically.

"KP, do you think this is like the time we fell asleep and had the same dream at the museum?"

"Well, Drakken's rants can get pretty boring; but before the vortex he didn't so much rant as complain.  And I'm pretty sure we were awake going through ours; unless something else happened but I doubt it.  By the way, Ron, I gotta get out of these wet clothes, do you have your spare mission outfit in your backpack?"

"I'll have it out in a sec."

After dragging some driftwood from the riverbank to hang her clothes by the campfire Kim stripped down, wringing out the water from her clothes and underwear, stopping a moment to look at her sportsbra� _why do I even bother wearing this thing, it's not always that comfortable and it's not as if I really need one�was usually able to get away with going braless�oh yeah, stretching in front of Dad that one day while wearing a 'short' crop top with nothing underneath�overreact much Dad?  If it wasn't for Mom, Dad would've had me dressed as a nun._

As he rummaged through his pack Ron felt unusually flustered.  Yes he had seen his best friend in various stages of undress since they were little, even nude; a lot of times the dictates of a mission required changing within close proximity to each other; not to mention the brain switch incident.  Most of the time he could give Kim the semblance of privacy by averting his eyes; recently, however, he had been in the habit of casting furtive glances while she changed, genuinely appreciating how attractive she was yet feeling ferociously guilty for doing so.  This time however, he was busted.

"Ron, if you keep trying to sneak looks you're going to strain your eyes and hurt your neck, plus it's taking you longer to find clothes for me."  After putting on the cargo pants her best friend gave her, she put on her still slightly damp mission shirt, pulled the dry shirt on to 'Monique' and knelt in front of him with a mixture of slight annoyance and some concern, "Ron, since when did you start checking me out?"

The blond stared at his backpack, "Sorry KP, it's just that since the Moodulator I've been thinking things.  I mean, the first time Zita and I kissed I just thought it was so mind bogglingly wowful.  But when you kissed me in front of your locker it was as if every nice feeling we ever experienced together since we were little was jammed into that one lip lock.  But then I panicked, I figured you were on the rebound from Josh and didn't know what you were doing so I wanted to stop things in case us having a relationship tanked; if we hooked up and it turned out those feelings weren't real you might've got mad at me for taking advantage then we wouldn't be friends anymore.  So then I started trying to convince people that what happened was just a rebound thing and that we were still just best friends but I found it harder to convince myself.  And then I wonder, how did I miss Tara's crush on me; I know I was a little distracted from breaking up with Zita but I've known Tara since kindergarten.  I know I can be dense KP but how did I miss that?  And now I look at you and you're not just my KP anymore�you're also a girl now.  The scariest part is if there is a chance for us to get together and I miss it, like I missed with Tara, well�I just don't want to miss that chance KP."

"We had a talk about this after that episode�" suddenly struck with a realization the redhead was dumbfounded for a moment, "Ronnie�are you saying you're in love with me?"  Kim watched Ron smile bashfully and scratch the back of his neck; biting her lip she muttered, "This is so the drama." 

The redhead took his hand in hers, "Best friend talk here Ronnie; do I have your serious face," seeing him look up at her she continued, "If I figure out the Moodulator feelings were real I'll be choosing you because I **am** in love with you and not because you're the rebound guy; believe me, you'll know when that happens.  Who knows, at Junior Prom we may end up going as a couple.  In the meantime you're still my best friend forever and I trust you, you shouldn't feel bashful looking at me anytime, because, I don't�as long as no one else is around�especially Dad. "

The conversation was cut short by coughing from the little girl; getting up immediately the hero made her way to comfort her young charge, "Look Ron, I promise we'll talk more when we get home, right now it's time to focus on mission mode.  Get your canteen cup and bring some water from the river and bring an energy bar, then get started on cooking the trout; I'm pretty sure we're all hungry."

"Right KP, Rufus find me some sticks I can use to hold the fish with."

Switching into babysitting mode Kim sat the dark-skinned girl on her lap, cuddling her to keep her warm and calm. 

Young brown eyes looked in confusion from the river, to the redhead, the campsite then focused on the fish cooking over the fire; eagerly accepting the cup of water she, however, looked at the energy bar with suspicion before setting it down.  The little one pointed to the fish, ~ _Olen nalkainen, Saisinko kala?_ ~ "I'm hungry, can I have some fish?"

"What did she say KP?"

"I think she's hungry, how long till supper?"

"Just a few KP."

While the blond was finishing up supper with Rufus' assistance the hero turned to the raven-haired girl, who was carefully examining the strange shirt she wore, and pointed to herself and her friends in turn, "I'm Kim, that's Ron and Rufus," then pointing at the little one, "and you?"

The young girl's eyes lit up with understanding and pointed to her rescuers then to herself, ~ _Kim, Ron, Rufus�Nimeni on Monique klaanin Lyatria._ ~ "Kim, Ron, Rufus�my name is Monique of Clan Wolfdancer."  Looking at Rufus with keen interest she spoke to him, ~ _Ma pole kunagi nainud rott, kellel ei ole yuukseid enne. a oled vaga tark, sa oled tuttav? Need inimesed naivad kena, nad on toredad inimesed?_ ~  "I've never seen a rat with no hair before.  You're very smart, are you a familiar?  These people seem nice, are they nice people?"

Rufus was stunned, no one ever spoke to him in forest speak; he chattered excitedly to Monique, ~ _Unh-huh ... Peuhap yuuksed mu inim-, tulekahyu yuuksed tema sirber ... hea yahimehed, mitte kunagi nailyane, tugevad viritleyad isegi kaitsta ei pakk ... teeb tugevat poega, tugev pakk._ ~  "Unh-huh...sun hair my human, fire hair his mate...good hunters, never hungry, strong fighters even protect not pack...will make strong cubs, strong pack."  With that the mole rat scampered to the little girl and gave her a hug which in turn elicited a giggle.

Looking at each other the heroes sat dumbfounded at the exchange between little Monique and Rufus although seeing the two hug each other was encouraging, "KP, did those two just hold a conversation?"

"Yeah, and it was in a different language than the first one she used."

A whistle and oh-oh from Rufus got Kim and Ron's attention, noticing also the little girl's eyes open wide as she stared behind them.  They turned slowly at the sound of a low growl from behind.  The sky had darkened as the evening settled in thus they only had the firelight to see by; yet it was enough to see the visitors to their camp site.  Directly in front appeared to be a large wolf, easily four feet high at the shoulders.  Behind were about a dozen individuals wearing clothing coloured in muted greens and browns, some wore what appeared to be leather armour; most had spears levelled in their direction and the rest had bows aimed at them.  The most striking feature was their faces; the skin had a coppery tone tinged with green, they had sharp jaw lines, narrow chins, high cheek bones and the eyes were sharply angled upwards with rather large pupils; to top all that off the ears were long and sharply pointed.

Eyes' opening wide with excitement, Ron exclaims enthusiastically, "KP, these guys look like Elfkin which means we must be in Everlot�which means we might run into Wade.  Hey maybe we'll find Zita too�"

"�Ron, in the moment," growled Kim quietly as she stared in disbelief at her best friend, "So not Everlot; things are so worse than moopy right now."

* * *

A rather small androgynous looking individual entered a spartan dining room occupied by a similar individual who was seated.  Sitting down it placed a small stone statue upon the table.  The small idol had each of its four sides carved in the likeness of a seated monkey holding a pair of cymbals.

The second individual addressed the visitor, "Greetings sibling, how go your endeavours?"

"Very well indeed, sibling.  Fa'durtzkak managed a brief foray into the Monkey Realm to attack the Redeemed One with nightmares; however, we were able to briefly awaken the Redeemer long enough to dispel them.  Now,  the bloodlines of the Redeemer and the Redeemed One have been redirected from the Monkey Realm to the Dragon Realm to re-establish the missing bloodlines; it is hoped the Dark One is still unaware of this.  Fortunately there are still a few generations before Its proxies can launch attacks; by then the replacement bloodlines will be established in the Dragon Realm allowing the visiting bloodlines to return to the Monkey Realm to protect it."

"Good, anything else?"

"Yes, through good fortune the Redeemed One was accompanied by the Lantern of the Monkey Realm when her bloodline was redirected.  Furthermore, the fledgling Dreamcatcher has met the Redeemed One and a positive relationship has formed." 

"Are the bloodlines secure?"

"As well as can be; they have been placed in an obscure area of that realm and for the time being Fa'durtzkak is still unaware of the redirection."

"Excellent that is most encouraging.  Would you care for some refreshment; I have some tea prepared that you may find quite soothing."


End file.
